How do I get my boys to understand that if you mess up you have to pick it up. Isn't that what life is all about. There is always a consequence right? I am trying to teach my kids this but many days it backfires. Today was such a day. I don't want to yell and be mean but it is not o.k. to ruin, destroy, mess up, etc.... and have a complete disregard for our home. I threaten to throw the toys away and I don't even think they care so I am looking for a consequence that is appropriate and not wimpy. I am not a mom that just says because you disobeyed me you can be in time out for thirty seconds and be on your way. I am not against time out but sometimes I think they like it. So I am hoping to find something that makes them just a little miserable.
Today, Jackson had to clean the play room by himself for punishment but I think I ended up punishing myself. It took him a good four hours to accomplish the task. He tried to trick Jason into doing if for him. He asked him for help and Jason said he would and soon enough Jackson was watching Jason work. That didn't last long because Jason certainly wouldn't clean voluntarily or by some five year old punk trying to trick him into doing his job. So he was on his own again. I had to direct the entire time- if I left him alone the work would cease. So after hours... we finished together.
I also don't think it should be punishment for him to clean up his own messes. I have to clean up my own messes. I think it would be better to learn this lesson at five rather than thirty. If you screw up when your an adult you are the one who has to clean up the mess. I just don't want my kids turning thirty and not knowing how to do anything. My mom sometimes had to nag and I didn't especially like it but I am thankful that she did because I don't want to be a slob or a screw ball. I also don't think I'm overly uptight and I'm quite able to role with the punches most of the time but I don't think I should always be the flexible one. So basically I'm asking for suggestions.
Please HELP!
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8 comments:
jessica keep on trying. It takes a long time. Sometimes it never happens consider your oldest. Put a lock on the toy closet.
My best suggestion is to pick up for a few minutes before bed. Do it together and you can direct. (Jack pick up all the weapons.) It also helps to have a spot for all like objects.
I often feel at a loss in this area of life. So I often resort to b'n and moaning, and then I don't like myself. I have been trying to divide my housework into Monday I do laundry, Tuesday floors, ect, ect. I found if I stick to my schedule then my house if fairly easy to maitain. It is all about daily maintance so you don't wake up and see the mess and feel paralyzed by the sight. The fly lady I think she had the best plan. Good luck!
Hey that sounds like no fun! I have had plenty of days just like that. One of the things that more often then not that works to get my boys attention, and what i mean by that is Connor and Chandlers attention and not Gavin's becuase he just does not get the rewards concept or any thing of the kind including negative consequences. Any ways long story ther, but we talked to the boys about what punishments they would not want to have and they had to give examples, and those are some of the things they lose if they can not follow instructions or misbehave for the 40th time! In short they lose highly coveted privileges, like their friend privileges or their game privileges, which includes the wii or ps2. I hope you get lots of suggestions and that something will work! Good luck! Hey have you heard from Jackson's Kindergarten teacher?
Sorry, I am not much help...I have a hard enough time making Arden stay in her time out spot! Arden is still young enough that if I start singing the clean up song she will usually join in, but I guess Jack is too old for that. Good luck. How is the Daniel doing with the potty training? Arden was doing great, but had an accident this morning out of the blue :(
jessica help
help
I don't know if you have tried this but, here it goes. Messes with me drive me crazy!!! I have to clean up my messes all the time. Steve on the other hand had his Mommy pick up after him all his life. So I am having to teach him now!! It is a nightmare. I am constantly nagging and telling him to put his stuff away. Yesterday, the milk was left out for 2 hours. When I got home. Not so much of good milk anymore. What a waste of good milk and money. Teach them while they are young for sure. I take away the toy privilage if it is not picked up the same day. I also take away video games and playing with friends. I never have seen Isaac scurry so fast to clean stuff up when I threaten a cold shower or no friends!! I also only let him take one toy out at a time. Before he gets another, he has to put away the first one. (That works 1/2 the time) When others come over it's crazy!! Good luck Jessica!! Thanks for your help today @ craft night.
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